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COACH YOU BLOG

Do YOU mean what you say?
19/6/2023

You are no doubt sick of hearing about lockdown shenanigans, celebrity indiscretions and not just “overpromise: under-deliver” but downright lies.  Me too…

 

This could so easily become a self-righteous rant about the impact on the young, the uncertainty and the disappointment but it just leads to a sense of gloom. So, what is the gift or opportunity here?

 

If we read Debbie Ford’s “Dark Side of the Light Chasers” we recognise what we most despise is what we need to own in ourselves. If we explore lack of integrity in ourselves then, we can reclaim our power?

 

Most of us believe we have a strong moral compass and it’s not our word to others that let us down. We produce reports on time, we honour that pay rise and deliver on promises to the children. It’s our promises to ourselves that falter. So much so they become part of the cultural vernacular: “diet starts tomorrow…” and even our promises not to overwork, to rest and spend time with the family drop away. How often have we started a new regime of taking our packed lunch into work to save up for xyz and lasts a week? Carefully negotiated budgets are blown after the first bottle of wine at the weekend. Even as friends we collude in the letting go… “forget the detox, have another drink!”

 

And believe me, I am including myself in this.

 

Pushing the boundaries of negative behaviour works in just the same way as pushing the boundaries of positive behaviour – it becomes easier the more often we do it.

 

There is no booming voice from the heavens saying “NO, DON’T DO IT, YOU PROMISED…”! Just a little sick, sinking feeling in your stomach and a knowing, as you drop your eyes to the floor.

 

A one-off is no big deal, of course it isn’t. To err is human. But every time we break a promise to ourselves we chip away at our self-belief, our confidence and our integrity.

 

Enough.

 

Let’s start a new trend, a craze, a grass roots revolution. We British are rubbish at revolution, we always end up towing the line. Not this time …

 

Let’s tow our own line. If we cannot trust or believe in politicians and celebrities let’s believe in ourselves. Start small, make a tiny promise to yourself and stick to it!

 

• Maybe just have one coffee in the next 24 hours and be less grouchy

• Go for a walk at lunchtime every day this week and get that serotonin hit

• Buy no new clothes for the next month and help save the planet

• What’s yours?

 

If you really want to create a new habit then keep score and keep your promise for 13 weeks. These small things add up, you know? Just one less Starbucks a day will save almost £300 in that time.

 

More importantly you will give your willpower and self-belief a boost. You’ll stand a little taller, rest a little easier and start to imagine what is possible for you, when you can believe in yourself again…

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